I'm going through a frustrating time spiritually. I'm not even sure to call it a "spiritual problem" or if it's a desire. What I know is my heart wants to speak. I want to talk about what is going on, what has been changed in me and what can be in the future. But I'm not sure how to go about it, this is the frustration. So I guess I do know.
Talking about the mysteries of God is one of many topic of Him that interest me. Lately I think I've been suppressing the desire thinking that my focus needed to be else where. But today I'm not so sure. God has brought people into my life that are in need of His healing power. I feel so privileged to talk with them as they work to sort out their pain and hurts. It's a rush to see their minds and hearts open up to what God can do. I'm so thankful for the opportunities and am always wanting more. This is the frustrating part. I want to do this more but not sure how to go about it in a larger capacity.
There will be days that I have a craving to put together a retreat that focus on this or that. I spend time dreaming of ways to reach more people and share what God has blessed me with. When I hear of people struggling with relationships, esteem or whatever, it ignites a fire in me. But then something stops it and I question myself. Is this real? Is this what I'm to be doing? I don't have the back ground to be a speaker or to counsel others. Yes, I've experienced healing but does God want me to go in this direction? Maybe I could work the job I have then do something else in the way of ministry on the weekends? Maybe God will drop something in my lap of what I'm to do? Or maybe He wants me just were I am. But, my day dreams aren't fulfilling my hearts desires.
This is were ya'll come in! I need prayers. Pray that God will show me the way to reach more people or ask Him to grant me peace that I will continue to do His work just where I'm. Either way I want to do His will for I'm confident that it will be fulfilling to my soul making me Fit for Him.
Till next time!
